Laura\u2019s dishwasher had finally given up, so she scheduled a repairman to come by while she was at work. Before leaving, she explained everything over the phone:<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cI\u2019ll leave the key under the mat. Fix the dishwasher, leave the bill on the counter, and I\u2019ll mail you a check.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Simple enough.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
But then she added one more instruction \u2014 a strangely specific one.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cOh, and don\u2019t worry about my bulldog, Bob. He won\u2019t bother you. But whatever you do,<\/em> do not<\/strong> talk to my parrot. I repeat: do NOT talk to my parrot.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n The repairman laughed it off. The next morning he unlocked the door, stepped inside, and right on cue \u2014 the bulldog padded over, sniffed him, and went to sleep on the rug. No trouble at all.<\/p>\n\n\n\n The parrot, however\u2026 was another story.<\/p>\n\n\n\n The bird sat on its perch, watching him with narrowed eyes, muttering under its breath like it was plotting something. Still, he ignored it and started working under the sink.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Five minutes later, the parrot started in:<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cHey you! He bit his tongue, remembering the warning.<\/p>\n\n\n\n He tightened another screw.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cWow! You\u2019re dumber than you look!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n He ignored it.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cHey, genius! The bulldog is smarter than you!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n Finally, he snapped.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cThat\u2019s it! Shut up, you annoying little feather-duster!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n The house went silent\u2026 for two seconds.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Then the parrot screamed at the top of its lungs:<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cBOB! GET HIM!!!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n The bulldog, hearing his name and thinking it was an emergency, launched out of his peaceful nap and charged full speed toward the repairman like a furry missile.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Tools went flying. When Laura came home, she found a perfectly repaired dishwasher\u2026 and a bill with one extra handwritten note:<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cDishwasher fixed. Sometimes the animal you worry about isn\u2019t the one you should. Laura\u2019s dishwasher had finally given up, so she scheduled a repairman to come by while she was at work. Before leaving, she explained everything over the phone:… <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":3087,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-6936","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/storytimebuzz.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6936","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/storytimebuzz.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/storytimebuzz.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/storytimebuzz.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/storytimebuzz.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=6936"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/storytimebuzz.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6936\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/storytimebuzz.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/3087"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/storytimebuzz.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=6936"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/storytimebuzz.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=6936"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/storytimebuzz.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=6936"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}
A bulldog? No problem.
A parrot? How bad could that be?<\/p>\n\n\n\n
You call that working?
I\u2019ve seen sloths move faster!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
The repairman tripped over the toolbox.
He scrambled out the door faster than he\u2019d ever moved in his life.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Your dog is fine.
Your parrot, however\u2026 is a menace to society.
Never calling again.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
And sometimes a parrot is the most dangerous creature in the house.<\/strong><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"